Warning: The following blog entry includes lady talk. You’ve been warned.

When I hit puberty, my mom (aka Judy Smooth) repeatedly told me never to wear tampons. She claimed they were gross and would give you “the toxic shock syndrome”. If you notice, I put that phrase in quotes because Judy Smooth has her own version of the English language. As I mentioned in previous posts she has various antidotes and putting “the” before things is just one of the many. For example, she might say, “Mary called yesterday and her sister Beatrice has THE cancer”. Emphasis on the “the”.

Anyways, I never wore tampons. Ever. I survived by using maxi pads until the rightful age of 29. I missed many a swimming activity because Aunt Flo stopped by for a week long visit. A few months ago, I thought what the hell and tried out a free sample of tampons I received in the mail. [Read more...]